The Hot Chocolate Girls of DC!

So Mia and I went to DC on the COLDEST day of the year!! We walked from the Capitol to the Natural History Museum. In between the Art Gallery and the Museum is this ice rink and a cafe...

We decide to go in to eat and to warm up! All of our fat had frozen!! We sat by the window to watch the skaters (fall) hehe! So we eat and we were about to be done and a lady walks up and asks if we would like some FREE hot chocolate?!! UMMMM, yes! So we find out that there is a camera crew filming a show about the ice skating rink and the tradition of getting hot chocolate had to be included. So we became the 'Hot Chocolate Girls' They took about 3 takes of us smiling at the counter and drinking. EVERY time I took a drink I managed to get whipped cream on my nose! But we did enjoy the hot chocolate and we'll hopefully be on TV the 15th of Feb on the Washington DC PBS channel!! I think at 8pm. So tune in!! :0)

Missing England

Well, it's been a few months since we moved from England. And I miss it! I miss everything! My neighborhood is the thing I miss the most. I have some great friends in that Close. And life was easy there. Only one choice at the commissary! I never got headaches there. This new commissary every time I go in it I get a headache! I didn't know that there were 15 choices of pasta all the same shape!! Tesco had the BEST produce ever! And the markets were wonderful!! I miss the weather too! All this sun is nuts! We've been to DC a few times and it was neat and I liked going to all the monuments but it's no London. I keep wanting to go back home. Like we are just visiting. I do like the house we have and the community is great for shopping and our church is wonderful. It's just not the same. I had loads of stay at home moms as friends that at any time we could go and hang out with each other. I had lots of friends just across the street from me for when we only had one car it wasn't an issue. Here I feel really separate from everything. Brent works in such tight security I can't go see him. I have met 1 of his co-workers she's really nice but there is no connection with anyone else. We are like 20 mins from the base and I haven't met anyone from there either, it's a little hard with out a car to get there. Brent tries to let me go and do things when he gets home but I don't want to go anywhere after dealing with the kids all day. And going to the commissary isn't 'mommy time'! I'm selling Creative Memories but I can't get out and meet people during the day. I have crops once a month and do other workshops but it's not what I want out of my business. I just need to get thru the holidays and get up and just go and do. Even if I have to walk, just to get out. That's what I miss about England, I guess life changed for me there and it stayed the same but I just moved and I haven't figured out how to make it the same. Or maybe it will never be the same. Oh, well I'll just go have a cup of PG tips and smile for now.

Philip even misses it! When he get really sad or tired he asks to go home. When I ask him where home is he doesn't know but it's not here. It breaks my heart! He wonders where Grandma Joan is he asked to go see her the other day. He loves to watch Charlie and Lola with thier accents. I feel bad for him he has memories and doesn't know how to know that we aren't going back to his home.

But I will be forever grateful that I was able to have the experience and have such wonderful friends and places to miss. And I can always go back! TTFN!

In a BAD mood!

Really don't know why! I woke up like this! Hurting and sore throat! Not much fun! I'm even crabby! (more than usual!) :0) I know I have things to get done today but I don't want to do them. Brent starts working 12 days straight and the night shift! I know that it's only for 12 days but Mia is coming to town and it just disrupts our lives! He is only a minority of married people in his shop but he 'would get the best training' on the night shift! Well phooey on the 'best training' I want to be selfish and not have my husband sleeping during the day and have to keep the kids quite and not get to do anything as a family with Mia here. All leave would be denied too! I guess I feel mostly bad for Mia she took time off and spent money to come up here!!! And I had to schedule Michael's birthday so Brent could at least be there! I'm not used to my husband not being there, I know I'm one of the lucky military spouses. Brent has been at both births, all Dr appointments, major milestones and birthdays.

I'm just in a bad mood! I feel like I do and do and nothing ever gets done! or it's not appreciated! It may be acknowledged verbally but actually trying to help keep it up is all but lost! So that's when I feel it's not appreciated. I know that this is my job and I try to be the best fly baby I can be but there is a whole wall of clocks, pen sets, plaques, mugs....of how great he is at work out of 100s of people. Well I'm only one and I don't need a mug but it's thankless. I can have it clean and organized and it will look like a tornado hit minutes later! I think if anyone worked for 2 hours on a computer to have the thing turned off and lose everything lost would be a little pissed! That's all! I know that there will be setbacks and that 4 people live here and I'm trying to teach the 2 almost 3 year old to help do things (you can never start to early) But how do you teach an old dog new tricks! You can't not even by example! I think the only way that the military get them to do the things they want them to do is by fear..fear of failure, dissapointment, recycling, or getting kicked out. It created stress, that's not how marriage should be. But it seems to be the only effective way! But I'm not about that. I had a friend that didn't put a tool away and it was bad news he got into a lot of trouble, because it could have hurt others and that wasn't the proper procedure. Well if you don't put your clothes into the hamper it won't kill anybody but it will upset someone. What's the difference?? Well ending someone's life is not the best thing but upsetting your spouse and not trying to help and see that there is a place for things is not that nice either. I guess that there are no demotions in marriage is the saftey net. There is no rank structure in marriage you are equals. But shouldn't there be respect and mutual understanding of things that need to be done to create harmony in the home. I don't have to anwser to anybody if I don't make the bed but it's not as nice. I don't know I just feel blah.... I'll stop now! Is there any one out there that feels the same way???

Christmas Star

So we set up the tree this past weekend. Brent, Patrick and Me. Sunday we got the lights up. Had to go buy a few new ones. They were pushing 7 years. So Monday morning Philip woke up to see the tree. The first thing he asked was where's the Christmas Star??? How sweet is he!? We have had silver ribbon that tops the tree since Katy broke the first topper we bought. But I think this year we may have to consider a star. Monday night we decorated the tree. Leaving a few ornaments for Philip to put up. He put all of the candy canes in one place making a candy cane colony for us. I don't have the heart to move them. He was so proud of it. He also got Brent to hold him all the way up to put the star ornament up at the top! Michael sat and supervised from the exersaucer. It was fun putting the tree up this year!

Things are changing....again.....

Well, it's nearly been 3 years since I've been here and I belive that all of the feelings are coming back! Last time I was pregnant with Philip having to say goodbye to family and friends to go half way around the world to live for 3 years. I wasn't scared of what would happen just the unkown and being alone and so far away. Now, I'm leaving the "foriegn land" I now call home to go to another "foriegn" place this time with 2 babies. We came as two and are leaving as four! We are going back "home" to the wonderful land of free gift with purchase and WAL-MART! but at the same time this is my babies home. Philip knows this house and the people around it. He has his first friends and adopted family. I have made roots here, and now I have to pull them up. And it's sad. I'm sad to leave. Not stressed or anything like that. SAD! I've brought my babies home here and watched them grow up. I know we are in the military and this is our life (and a blessed one it is!) but I guess I feel like I can be sad about this and grieve for a little while. I have loved every minute of living here in England. All of the things I have gotten to see and do because I was here. We have shared holidays with people and learned new things. I had to adapt to the "English" way of things including not being able to get what I want because of the lack of malls and Wal-Mart! They do things different with babies and I do like it. I'm gald I had my 2 babies here. They will have a great start to thier story. I guess I just had to say that I am sad to leave England the place I have called home for the past 3 years. There have been some great times and some very memorable times (2 births!) and I will miss the place but I will always have the memories. And for those who know me A LOT of pictures to prove it!

My Boys

So here I am with my boys.....They look just like my Husband, Brent and I LOVE IT!! Everybody thinks that Michael looks like me but it's only the dark hair that does it! He looks a lot like Philip did at this age. He also looks like my Sister Mia when she was a baby. She asked me one day if I know how to make babies that look like me....apparently NOT! But as Grandma says they sure are pretty! I would like to one day finish my degree and become a teacher. But I think at this point in my life I can say that I'm living my dream. For as long as I can remember I have wanted to be a mommy. And I feel blessed and honored to be thier momma. They are so much fun, everyday is a new adventure. Not all days are great, but at the end of the day I am happy and content, That's what life is all about really isn't it??

Michael is our baby, he seems to be growing so fast!! He's the sweetest cuddle bug!! Brent calls him "Buggy" He gives the sweetest smiles and kisses (learning) All the little things he does during the day just make the room light up. He loves his big brother, whenever he sees Philip he smiles and starts to kick. I was wondering at first if I was crazy to have 2 so close together but they will be life long friends and watching them grow will be an adventure. He babbles all the time and gets sooo excited when he sees a bowl. He has no food that he doesn't like!! That's my baby! He's very sensitive but always has a smile for you!

Philip our first born is a dream come true. I love my boys with all my heart but there will always be a special place for the 1st born. My life was forever changed when I first saw him in the operating room. He is so musical, and creative! He's the smartest 2 year old I know!! He is always full of laughter and has a hug and a smile for you!! Even when he's upset and doesn't want to go to bed he won't be rude and not hug and kiss everyone in the room. He comes up with new words every day!! Yesterday while he was eating his cereal, he declared that it was "delicious!" What a funny monkey!!! He may not look like me but he can talk like me! LOL! He's learning how to ride his trike that he got for Christmas, it's been hard because it's not always the best weather here, but he's getting the hang of it!! He loves to help me in the kitchen, he knows to bring a chair in and he can help me. He loves to read and be read to! He has instuted 'rockababy' at night just last month. We change into PJs, "change diaper" and read a few books and some poems. It's so much fun playing house with Brent and dolls with the boys!

My 5 Favorite Words

Mommy- It's the word that any woman can hear and they melt. The first time you hear it out of the mouth of your baby is one of those moments like when you hear, "will you marry me?" Time stands still and you are forever inducted into the proud sisterhood of mommys. Mama is nice too. You become something bigger than yourself. The word can really have no true definition it's all things wrapped into one being. I love hearing it and proud to be one to my boys!

beautiful-This word is another one that can have many meanings to everybody. What is beautiful to me will not be beautiful to another. But anyone can find beauty in anything. I'm not a huge Christina Agulera (sp?) fan but I love her song "beautiful" If only everybody would feel this way no matter size, race, religion....the world would be a happier place. Beauty to me can be as simple as a rose or as complex as the image I saw when Philip and Michael were born. When someone tells you that you are beautiful, take it and love them for it. You may not belive this of yourself but to that person it is true. And I love that I am beautiful to one person and am starting to belive it.

family-this word can have no boundries. I have my "blood" family the ones that I have been blessed to share a physical bond with. Then I have my extended family, the ones that I hand picked to be apart of me. I also have a much larger family that I will be apart of when we all get to heaven, most of my family and adopted family are included in this large family as well! But most of this family I haven't even met yet! I have a military family that has supported me during many times in my life. We have adopted Grandmas, Aunts, Uncles, Cousins, Sisters, Brothers, Moms, Dads. I love to surround myself with family. It is one of my basic needs. I love that Brent and I have started our family and that the boys will grow up in such a large family.

happy-Have you ever noticed that you CANNOT say this word with out smiling???? Try it! It's the best word to say! It makes you happy. That's why It's one of my favorites!

faith-I love this word because it makes the unseen visible through a word. Yes, you can have faith in a person to uplift them, but I'm talking about the faith of God and His Son. To my knowledge no one has ever seen either in my life time. Christ walked the earth many years ago and was seen by many and they still didn't have faith that what He said was true. And sad to say that 2000 years later it's still happening. But I have faith that all things will come to pass. And that the unseen will be made visible. I love that you can have the faith the size of a mustard seed and still move mountains! I love that! It's awsome, can you imagine what GREAT faith could do?? Faith: one of my favorite words!

What are some of your favorite words and why?? Do we share some favorite words?

What does love look like to you?

That's a good question huh? Everybody always knows what it feels like and what it sounds like even what it tastes like (mmmm, chocolate!) But what it looks like is more difficult....

One thinks....should I be thinking of a person place or thing? One of my favorite characters quoted "love is like oxygen" if that's true then love looks like anything and everything. All things are made up of oxygen it's the most basic element. Thus love will be the most basic of needs.

So, to anwser what love looks like to me. As a child it was my father walking into my room with a small gift when I had been sick in bed for days and reading me a story, Uncle Remus (with briar rabbit and briar bear) As a young girl it was the poodle skirt that my mom stayed up all night making so I could have the halloween costume I wanted in time. As a teenager it was the red head I had a crush on for so long smiling at me. As a adult it was the same face of that red head with flowers and the same smile. As a mother it is the smile in my baby boys that mirrors the smile of the red head that I still have a crush on after all of these years.

So, I guess love can look like many different things as one gets older but one thing stays the same it's the smile of those you love that's what love looks like to me.

On the other hand, I belive I have never before seen love in it's true form until I saw my first born for the first time. That image of mine and Brent's love made physical and bright technicolor and surround sound will be forever etched in my mind. That is true love at first sight. It's a crazy love that people say doesn't exist but I'll let you know that flash of lighting and feeling of love are one in the same. And until they have experienced it they will always doubt of it's exisistence.

So, my question for you is: What does love look like to you??

What is WRONG with people in this country??

Well, I saw that clip that many people have posted (I did as well) of that woman, I made the mistake of calling her a lady (Southern in me) but I could not belive that people that go to church and say that they are Christians would do something like that to Military families!! Especially during the last time they will ever spend time with a loved one that died away from home serving the country! To thank God for 9/11 on the same channel that had anchors crying on air when they told us what had happened, and have the gall to say we are being punished for war by losing our sons and daughters!! God BLESSES America!!! Don't get me wrong, God does punish the wicked, it's all over the Bible. But I belive that God is good, he is the God of mercy and peace. It even says there is a time for everything a time for war and a time for peace....So how could that group of people proudly say and do such things??!!

I one time asked Brent, if it ever were to happen in his presence what he would do if someone burned a flag. He told me that it was thier right to do that, it wouldn't make him happy but that's what he gets up every morning and puts on the uniform and defends our country for. To allow some one to have the right to do something like that to something that he respects and salutes. We have Freedom like no other civilization in the world. It's what we fight for to help bring to others, it's what that Soldier died for. But to have his own people disrespect him, his family and what he fought for is unforgiveable. I do not believe that God would endorse such a thing. He teaches us to lift up one another and to love, not tear down and hate.

It's extremistis like her and her family that give Christians a bad name. Many people will do things in the name of God that are horrible people and claim that it's what God wants and the Bible tells us to beware of those people. I'm not the judge, God is and they will have to give an account of what they have done not only as people but what they have done to other people. I can only imagine that by her testimony someone turned from God because of her example! How sad, I pray for that church to learn humility and respect for the people that defend thier rights to do and say such things! They must spend loads of money tracking down these funerals and going to them to ruin them. They should maybe spend that money on God's work not thier own agendas. OR better yet STAY HOME! ok...I'm done for now.

May God continue to Bless America

My Mom wears combat boots

Ok, so I have been pretty "normal" about my dad being in Iraq twice. Both times when I had each baby!! Nooo, I love stress! But he didn't do it to upset me I know but still. Being 39 weeks pregnant with Philip and having mom here in England and the phone ringing and it's dad and we hear the RPGs flying over head and he's hiding between a building and a dumpster to say good bye to mom isn't my idea of a good time!! But the media really wants to only show the "bad" side of the people of Iraq. Well, they are really nice people, they have been nothing but kind and generous to my family, that has been in Iraq. They just want what any human wants, shelter, food, water, to be happy and FREEDOM! That's why my parents are over there, to help give that to them. Dad brings water to villages that haven't had running water ever! And helps bulid schools.

But back to the subject....on the playground it was an insult to hear "your momma wears combat boots" Well I think I would still get into a fight over it but only to defend the honor of those little combat boots. I don't like the fact that she is in Iraq or that there have been attacks on the compound that she lives at but I do like the fact that I tower 8 inches over her that she is there and facing things I would never dare face. But I still don't want her over there! She has to wear a helmet and kevlar (spelling) vest mommies shouldn't have to wear these things. Now, I respect all women in the military you do something I could never do. But when it's your momma, and you are a momma things change. She's a grandma!! She should be making cookies and knitting baby blankets....well my grandma never knitted but you know what I mean. She shouldn't have to get in an armored vehicle to go 5 miles down the road!! I try not to worry about her but I do all of the time. I know that she is with dad and that's the only thing that keeps me from going crazy. I don't talk about it much because...I start thinking about it and I can't go there. I have 2 kids and a house to run and I don't need to become a mess. I'm proud of her but I just hope she knows that I have always been proud of her. We have our differences (Daddy- but that's another blog) but she is my mom and nothing can stop me from being a frightened little girl. I get to talk to her as much as I want to and leave it to mom to find shopping! I have received many wonderful gifts from her since she has been there. My top favorite are the 2 flags that were flown over the embassy in Mosul in honor of her service. One for Michael and one for Philip. We are going to have shadow boxes made and frames for the certs and they will always be in the boys room. That's something very dear to me. Being in England I can't wave a flag or post a yellow ribbon outside my home but I fly one in my heart and there is always a yellow ribbon attached to it for my little momma in combat boots.

Sorting Sequins

Well this is a new one for me! I was feeling really good and getting a lot of chores done around the house. Had a nice morning with a friend and her 2 boys with my boys. Came home. The boys were napping....THANK GOD they nap at the same time!! They also go to bed around the same time too!! It's just me that stays up late!! But I came into the office/scrapbooking/craft (smallest room in the house) room and started to fling 28 things! I LOVE FLYLADY!! And did that, while on the phone with the Mother-in-love (multi-tasking....not for the men folk) and decided that the sequins that I had made ornaments with a few years ago that were all sorted (originally) before I moved and messed up by the crappy movers needed to be sorted. Now these are gold, silver and irridecent! (I can't spell, don't care!) Why I thought this was a good idea I will never know. But I set my timer for 15 minutes and away I went, hey it's anti-procratination day! So I got quite a bit done but why I did this I have NO earthy idea....I was talking to Daina as my eyes started to cross because of the color combination and said I'm sorting sequins!! WHY??? Why do the little things we do make us feel better??? I didn't even finish but I felt a sense of accomplishment. Like today, Brent came home and noticed that I had folded laundry and actually said thanks!! I don't need roses any more (chocolate yes!) But that made my day! I guess I'm in the middle of the "spring cleaning" thing and knowing that I'm moving in a few months I finally have come into my own about being a mom of 2 and a housewife. I know how to do both I just haven't found a haromony for them both for me yet. I guess today the two of me found a way to make it work. And I have only a few words left...."That will do Mom, That will do...." tear, smile, little sunshine. END SCENE!

Will the work ever be done???

Well, the boys are in bed asleep and they were in bed by 9:15 thank you very much! There's dishes to be done and laundry to be folded.....it's never done!! I know that I need to do these things it just doesn't get done. Now, we have clean dishes and clean clothes it's just a never ending thankless thing!!! I would much rather play with Philip or read one of the 5 books I checked out last week still sitting in the bag! Getting really anxious about the list. We will know where we are going in May. This is starting to worry me. I'm rooted here, not that I don't want to go back to the states but I've made a family in this house. Both of my boys were brought here and slept here for the first time. This is home to them, well they don't know but Philip knows where is room is and where the kitchen is. I know in a few months most of my friends would have moved on as well after I move and some before but it's the place that I'm going to have a hard time parting with. I'm very torn, Brent hates the job, loves the place. I don't want him to be unhappy in his job, but it took a lot for me to be "ok let's move across the ocean, and then 1 week (yes 7 days) later knowing that I was bring a baby as well. Then we have another one. And this is home, this is were I see my babies. I'm sad that we'll never be in the house at Scott again or the 1st apartment we ever lived in when we first married but here there were little feet involved. And even though it's "British" small I like it, it's my home. Don't know how to feel about it, it's always in a working progress and I hate it and love it at the same time. But this will be our 3 base move when we leave here. I guess the thought of never coming back to where they were born upsets me. We say we will but I don't know if we ever really will. I guess I don't like change. But I know that where ever Brent is that's home to me. Because he's home. It's the unknown. I really stepped out of my shell (yes that's still possible) to come here and now I feel like I'm going to be put back in. Ah, the life of a Military Wife our job is never done!

Mother of 2!

Well it's been awhile since I've blogged! Busy with 2 beautiful boys! One, which is avoiding his nap! Ah, kids! Aren't they great!! The baby is sleeping. I'm getting used to the 2 kid thing. Philip is learning quickly that if mommy is nursing she can't get up and so he'll do everything he can just out of my reach and laugh at me!! ARRRGH!!! Poor Michael I think he gets an unterrupted meal at night and when Philip is asleep. Michael is so sweet, I can't belive he is almost 3 months old!! He does all of the little things that Philip did, we try to stop and soak in all of the things that he does. Life moves so fast, I remember it seemed like Christmas would never come, and now I run out of time trying to do all of the things I want to do. Last year was wild with my due date so close. I remember dropping mom off at the airport and wondering weren't we just here picking you up!!?? And it's almost Easter! It's been almost a year since we found out that Michael was coming! I guess that's the bittersweet part of being a mom time flies for the parent but drags for the child, they want it to go faster and we just want it to last. I guess I understand now. But for those who really know me I always have my camera ready for whatever may come up!! Well there is a ton of housework to do and the babies are asleep so I should get off of this and get working! A mother's work is never done!